moving again

so we are going to move again because this brick hutch is shit, it's too small, a fucking stupid shape and there is a cooker in front of one of the cupboards. Also living here I am paying for things i don't give a fuck about. For example I reckon I pay about ten quid a week to live on a quaint cobbled brick street - that is just annoying when you ride a bike, I am not the fucking Hovis kid. I pay about ten quid a week for the big iron gate at the end of the road as well which means you have to get out of the car to open and close them every time you arrive or leave AND it means that no one can be arsed to pick me up from my door so i have to go and wait in the street like a hooker. etc etc]

so right where am I at? I went to look at a flat earlier with Wicker, who is to be our flatmate, smashing location just off the Kingsland junction, all new stuff inside it, about five times the size of the daft box I am living in right now BUT the bottom half of all the windows were frosted and that made it a bit prisony AND the estate agent bloke had a limp handshake (DEAL BREAKER).

We had a loverly conversation, me and him, where i made him tell me exactly what tasks he was going to perform to justify the £175 referencing and admin fees he was to charge. Turns out he was going to let me phone my accountant to get him to send an email stating that I could afford to pay the rent AND fill out a form at the bank myself authorising them to confirm that i could pay the rent. Now that is such a fucking bargain I am thinking about doing it even though we are not taking the house. I wonder if that is allowed?

some adverts are priceless - this one was on Gumtree last time I was looking for a flat - non locals should be aware that Manor house and Dalston Kingsland are two and a half miles apart and that Dalston does not even have a fucking tube station.

One bedroom flat in Stoke Newington. located on green lanes - ideally situated moments between Manor House and Dalston Kingsland tubes MUST SEE. also has a kitchen and a bathroom

HOOT