Dear Janit

Last night I found an old notebook of mine - It contains a series of letters I wrote to my cat, Janit (sometimes she is also called Janet, sometimes Jane and occasionally Juanita) she is black and white and lazy and fat. These letters were written in a time before she was 'space hopper fat' as she is now but was already displaying signs of acute laziness and nonchalance, back around the turn of the millennia.

This morning I woke to find that Janet had done a big sicky hairball on a pile of my work ties. As she managed to tarnish the majority of them I have no choice but to assume it a calculated act of malice, as punishment I will be posting the letters up here over the next few weeks...